...but all you are is mean

they also realised it's been 1 whole month.
*sheepish*

me to self: it doesn't mean that it will be confirmed. it could be that every one thinks i'm damn clueless and decide NOPE they don't want me.
glass is half empty mentality.

anyway. everything looks boring to me. i don't want to do finance! i can't see myself in finance doing unexciting work until i'm old and dreary. sigh, already dreary now.
why must work be so boring?!
well, if it ain't boring and/or tough, it ain't work. it'd be called something else. i d'no. when you hear WORK, it has very slavish and difficult connotations.

so maybe wicked witch is just the game face of choice for some people. or it could be that they could look wicked.
*think pure and sweet thoughts*

i should stop judging people.
do you know i can dislike a person wholly due to her eyebrows? "oh! her eyebrows are so thin and arched. dislike!"
well, it's not unfounded right? people with thin and arched eyebrows are usually evil.

i'm undecided!
thing is, i'm okay when no one antagonizes me. i pms monthly so those few days, i am very difficult to work with. other than that, i'm fine!
i don't particularly hate anyone or anything. it's just that circumstances push me to be rebellious, vindictive and spiteful.
it's not that i'm intentionally spiteful. i'm a nice person! most person can attest to that.

haha perhaps i'm the sort who is so damn evil she doesn't know it herself.

JIAN right? sup kindly said whoever called me that should be shot.
ya see? i am not jian.

so hard to make a decision! so hard so hard so hard!
you know i could go on like this forever. like, i'll whine and complain that i'm undecided! get a coffee, take a nap, and then complain again!
never gets old.
can spam the same message to different people just to see their replies. oh, just to have someone to whine to.

mum says i should stop going out with people i don't even like.
that is the truest thing ever!
i don't know why i do half the things i do. i confuse myself. i create problems for myself.
maybe it's like attending free acting classes.
anyway.
unless i say it means something, otherwise it doesn't mean anything. so it's really annoying when they don't get it!
do i look like i care? oh gosh, NO!
although i can say oh there's only 1 person i've ever sincerely liked, it might not even be true. knowing me, i like many things but after i get them, i don't like them anymore. *mum is like, why do you want to buy a miu miu when you're already throwing your kate spade on the floor. it's not like kate spade is very cheap.*

SO. the joy is getting what i want. i just want it and end of story. once i get it, i might not want it anymore.
oh well. i should be a psychologist. i analyse myself so well.