it's almost 12 and i'm still awake.
why?
i'm not working.

wasted the weekend not assessing what's fucked up about my life. I know, deep in my heart, that it's a toxic concoction of issues but I'm just not willing to dissect it.
when I have time to think, I get reminded of how nothing is going swimmingly for me.
people keep telling me to stop being silly, to express myself but that's not helping. I don't stop thinking silly thoughts because they're silly. I can't help that my concerns are trivial to every one else.

I don't know how to tell people that they are making my life miserable. it's miserable with them around but would I be even more miserable when they're not around?

it's worth a try. why does it feel like I have to keep cutting people off from my life? why do I meet people who makes me feel like hell?