我要快乐

我并不是天生爱寂寞
却比任何人都多
就算把世界给我
我还是一无所有

Tried to have a peaceful discussion but we never did fare well at these things. SO. I'm more set to do what I want to. If discussions lead to restraints, I'd rather do it then notify later.

I should be jealous but right now, such trivialities are the least of my concerns. You know what? Just get together already. Although I'll be visibly disgusted and depressed for perhaps half a day, its not going to affect me significantly.

Fact- I prefer girls. Not disputing the fact that girls can be catty and hard to work with. Personally, I embody both things. I also admit I'm not warm to all girls because ... Eh I know she's your friend but she looks arrogant and in need of a shake up.
However, guys? Urghhhhh.
Does anyone else think they are problematic? If I'm lukewarm to girls I don't really like, cold to those I dislike, I'm frigid to guys I don't know/dislike.
Takes a lot to pretend to be warm. Apparently they can feel it. Especially on my off days when I don't even try.

Fact- I don't care. I know I can be kind and compassionate when I want to. Perhaps I'm not good at expressing myself so people think I'm ridiculously self-centered, selfish and mean.
Not to say I dispute those accusations. I can be all those things if I want to. Maybe I have to show more kindness.
Tough.

Signs that people are on a different frequency:
- they don't get your joke/lingo
- they preach to you to stop bitching
- in reply to them, you think ... ... nothing to say
- can't think of anything to support attempt to say hi
- conversation centers around work (obviously nothing else to talk about)
- you actually feel disgusted/shocked at the things they say
- wished you/they had something on so the conversation would end
- silence followed by awkward bye
- bye, not see you
- refusal to be associated unless absolutely compulsory
- occasional bouts of wanting to kill them